Here Without You
by foxs-dana
Summary: Sequel to "I'll Go Wherever You Will Go" Scully begins to feel new hope after reconnecting spiritually with Mulder. But will that connection be enough to hold her until she meets him again in the physical?COMPLETE! R & R!
1. He's Coming

Title: Here Without You

Author: FoxsDana

Email: 

Rating: PG

Classification/Key Words: Mulder/Scully romance, Scully POV, angst

Spoilers: The Unnatural, Nothing Important Happened Today

Summary: Dana Scully is left alone to raise her and Mulder's son William. She begins to feel new hope after reconnecting spiritually with Mulder. But will that connection be enough to hold her until she meets him again in the physical?

Dedication: To all my avid readers and especially to M & S forever who asked we to write a sequel to "I'll Go Wherever You Will Go". To the group "3 Doors Down" for writing a WONDERFUL song called "Here Without You" which inspired this fic. To all X-Philes present and future. And as usual to my wonderful and supportive husband who continues to inspire me every day. I love you Foxy!

Feedback: Please, I love it!

Archive: Sure! Just let me know where it's going!

Disclaimer: The characters of the X-Files do not belong to me but are the property of Chris Carter, 20th Century Fox and 1013 Productions. Any similarities to the names or places of the fictional aspects of this story are purely coincidental.

NOTE: This fic is a sequel to "I'll Go Wherever You Will Go" and continues on from the last scene.

I awake with a start and sit up looking around the room. Is he here? "Mulder?" I ask looking into the darkness. I keep looking around the room with hope in my eyes. And that is something that I haven't felt myself in a long time. I can still practically smell him; still feel his touch on my skin. It felt so real! It was true what Missy said we have reconnected again. But now as I find myself sitting here in the darkness alone, I want more than that! Now that I've seen him again I want him more than ever. I want him beside me to take the place of this cold spot on the other side of the bed.

I lay my head on the other side. HIS side. I have slept in this bed all alone for so many years, so why should it affect me now? But it is different now. Ever since the night our relationship changed and I made my choice, he consumes my every thought. Not a moment goes by that I don't think of him. He is normally lying beside me here. I can almost feel him nuzzling my neck. Feel his hot breath, which sends shivers all through me. God how I love this man. This beautiful, tender, loving, inspiring, wonderful man. I know that not everyone would agree with that last sentence but then again they don't know him the way that I do. This man knows me more than I even know myself. He has been so many things for me: friend, partner, lover, confidant and teacher.

Looking up at the ceiling, I remember the first day I met him. I can see him turning to face me wearing those reading glasses and giving me that smirk. Little did I realize that those hazel eyes would become a part of my life in more ways than I could possibly imagine. That I would loose myself in them and see that twinkle that was associated with him getting those crazy ideas. But even now I would love to hear one of those ideas crazy or not. And how many of those ideas ended up being right in the end? But he never rubbed it in my face like most would. No, he respected my opinions and valued them. Regardless of what others believe I did trust him right from the start. Why, do you say? I honestly can't answer that question. I guess it was because I just somehow knew. And I knew from that day forward that I would follow this man to the ends of the earth if I had to. And I have. And I wouldn't change anything for the world for it now.

As I lay there, I hear an all too familiar cry in the background. But there is something almost unusual about this particular one. It's not a cry of hunger or from wetness. It's a cry from deep within. It's like he knows what I am thinking and feeling. He too understands the emptiness that I feel. But he doesn't long for me. He longs for his father. How can a baby long for someone that he had only been with a few days? Is the connection between father and son truly that strong? I never would have believed it but I do now. He knows his father and will never forget him. He is the product of a special kind of love, a special bond unlike no other. He is our miracle that was never supposed to be. The only thing that keeps me going from day to day. The only part of him that I have left. My dear, sweet little baby boy. My little William.

I slowly rise from the bed and head into the nursery. I can see him lying in his crib crying with his tiny arms outstretched. It's like he's searching for something that isn't there. Maybe he's still looking for his father's touch? I lower my hands into the crib and gently scoop him into my arms. His crying seems to be more persistent tonight so I try patting his back gently. I am unsuccessful in this endeavor and start rocking him in my arms. His crying continues so I take him out to the living room and to a lone rocking chair, which sits by a window. This rocking chair was a gift from someone who has become a great friend to me ever since Mulder has been gone, Monica Reyes. She knows how much William means to me and comes over just about every day just to see him. She tries not to think of Mulder as she looks at him but I know she does and just doesn't want to tell me. She's the one who told me that William misses his father. That that is the reason he cries for no reason.

Easing myself into the chair, I continue to cradle his body. Shifting him slightly, I begin the gentle rhythms of the rocker. I then sing to him softly.

_Hush a bye, don't you cry_

_Go to sleep my little baby._

_When you wake, you shall have,_

_All the pretty little horses_

His crying lessens as I continue the movements of the rocking chair. This was the very same song that my mother used to sing to me when I was a baby. It's a tradition I have now passed on to my son. As I continue rocking him I slowly undo my pajama top. This is another way that we have bonded. How many nights have we spent in front of this window? Taking my breast out I offer him a nipple and he begins suckling. It's times like this that I'm glad to be a mother. When it can just be him and I bonding as mothers and sons do. Will he remember lying here at night with me nursing on my breast? I can assume not. But I will always have this memory.

As he continues to suckle, I look down at him and caress his forehead gently. "Your father, he is out there somewhere, William. And I know he misses you and loves you very much. And as soon as he is able to, he will be right here back with us. And then....he can sit right here in this very rocking chair at night with you like I am. You would like that wouldn't you? And then...when you're older, he can take you outside and teach you how to play baseball and basketball. And he can get you your own mitt and bat. And then...he can show you how to hit the ball."

I start to tear up as I think of how Mulder taught me to hit. That night we were at that baseball field with only an audience of one pitcher boy and the stars in the sky. The only sound that could be heard in the night was the cracking of a bat and our laughter. He had held me so close and I hadn't pushed him away. That birthday present was the best I had ever received. Because for that brief time I had been able to forget about the troubles of the world and become a person that I had thought was dead: Dana Katherine Scully. A person would have a hard time believing that such a simple thing as teaching me how to hit a baseball could change my life but it did.

And now as I stare down at our son, I realize that he will be wonderful just like his father. The thought of Mulder playing catch in the front yard with William is almost too much for me to bear. I can hear the laughing and giggling from William as Mulder tickles him. See them rough housing, as I have to call them into dinner. Boys will be boys. But these are two boys I am VERY proud of. These are two of the most important people in my life.

Looking down I realize that William has stopped suckling and is fast asleep. I gently take the nipple out of his mouth and tuck my breast back into my top. I bend down and carefully kiss the top of his forehead. "Sleep well, my little William. Dream of your father coming up and taking you in his arms. He's coming for us, William." I let out a yawn. "He's....He's coming." I then can feel my own weariness starting to overtake me from my astral journey earlier. "He's coming." My eyes start to close. "He's coming." I then finally succumb to my need for rest and fall asleep in the rocking chair with William in my arms.


	2. Believe in him, Dana

I'm sleeping peacefully when a knocking at my door rouses me. My eyes instantly fly open and I realize I'm still in the rocking chair with William in my arms. I look down and can see that he is still fast asleep. Not wanting to wake him, I slowly and carefully rise from the chair and place him in his bassinet. I cover him with a blanket gently and then kiss him on the cheek. I then hear the knock again and for one brief moment wonder if it could be him.

He's supposed to be far away I know but….what if he somehow managed to come back to us? After what happened last night, maybe he decided to come home? Oh what would I do if he were on the other side of that door right now? I would open the door and probably almost squeeze him to death from hugging him so tightly. I would hold onto him for minutes not saying a word. Just wanting to indulge in his scent, his warmth. And then I would pull back and give him the most passionate kiss I could muster, taking his breath away. And then I would tell him never to leave me again, no matter what the danger involved. For in my opinion any danger in the world is worth risking just to be with him. At least if he were with me, I would know if something happened to him. This uncertainty of not knowing is killing me.

I walk up to the door and look through the peephole expecting to see his handsome, charming face staring back at me. Maybe giving me one of those adorable smiles of his I remember. Instead, I see a female face that also has one of those smiles. I open the door. "Hello, Monica."

"Morning, Dana." Monica replies smiling at me. "Did you just wake up?"

"What?" I then observe my messy hair and ragged appearance. "Oh, yes. Yes, I did. Uh, would you like to come in?" I ask motioning her in as I step to the side.

"Thanks." Monica replies before stepping inside.

I close the door behind her. "Why don't you have a seat on the couch while I grab something to throw around me?" I then make my way over to the rocking chair as she takes a seat on the couch. Picking up a white blanket, I wrap it around me and then take a seat across from the couch. "So, what brings you here this early in the morning?"

"Early?" She lets out a chuckle. "Dana, its past 10 am."

"It….it is?" I then glance over at the clock on the wall and realize that she's right. "Oh god. I…I had no idea. Oh Monica, I'm sorry. I..I was supposed to meet with you in the office this morning about that case you're working on. I'm so sorry. It….it completely slipped my mind." I put my hand to my forehead upset that I had an important task to do and completely forgot.

"It's ok, Dana." Monica replies reaching over and placing her hand on mine. "I just figured if you weren't there this morning that you were probably here. Just call it a feeling." She tilts her head up and looks into my eyes. "What's wrong, Dana?"

"Wrong? Nothing….nothing's wrong."

"I can sense it from you, Dana." She pauses. "Is it Mulder? Did you have a dream about him again?"

"Isn't it always about Mulder anymore?" I whisper back closing my eyes.

She glances around and finds William sleeping in his bassinet. "You fell asleep in the rocking chair again last night didn't you?"

I slowly nod my head. "Sometimes….it's the only comfort I have when I'm upset."

Monica smiles. "So, it appears I made the right choice in getting it for you?"

"More than you can possibly imagine." _If she only knew just how much._ "Can I offer you some coffee?"

"I'd love some. And then I want to talk to you about what happened ok?"

I then hear William cry from his bassinet. I never thought I would be so glad to hear him cry but I don't want to talk about Mulder just now. "Let me just take care of William."

Monica rises from the couch. "I'll take care of William. You take care of the coffee."

I know there is no use arguing with her. Monica is kind of like the female version of Mulder to me. She knows when I'm trying to hide something and won't take no for an answer when she believes she is right. It's true that Mulder would listen to my side but if he believed he was right he wouldn't back down, just like Monica. I walk into the kitchen and go about making coffee. I can hear that the crying has stopped which tells me that William is now being cradled in Monica's arms. I'm always amazed how wonderful she is with him. I know if she ever has children of her own, she will be a wonderful mother.

As I stand in the kitchen, I wonder if I should tell her about Mulder? I could easily tell her that I had a dream about him but do I tell her what REALLY happened? Do I tell her that he and I have spiritually reconnected on another plane of existence? She is normally open-minded about things and is a spiritual person so why wouldn't she believe it? She reminds me of Missy in so many ways. She has helped me through so much from finding Mulder after he was abducted, bringing William into the world and helping me with Mulder's absence. So why shouldn't she with this?

"Ok, I took care of William. He just needed a little change. He's resting in his crib now. Coffee ready?"

I see the red light on the coffee maker flashing. "Yes. It just finished. I'll pour us a cup and bring it out."

"Ok." She smiles and then leaves the kitchen heading back out to the couch.

As I go about pouring the coffee into cups, I realize now that I have to tell her. She is such a close friend and needs to know. _She'll understand. I know she will._ I pick up a tiny tray and place the two cups on it along with some crème and sugar before heading back to the living room. "I wasn't sure how you wanted it so I brought both." I set the tray on the coffee table in front of the couch.

"That's perfect because I can be indecisive some days myself." Monica replies back with a grin. "Oh let's be daring today and do both. What the hell. John will probably lecture me about how it's not too good for an FBI Agent to consume it but oh well." She puts crème and sugar in her coffee and stirs it. "I won't tell him if you won't." She then takes a sip. "Mmmm…that taste good."

"Thanks." I reply as I go about taking care of my own coffee, taking a seat next to her.

"So, are you going to tell me what happened last night or do I have to guess?" She asks before taking another sip of her coffee.

"You're right, Monica in that I did see Mulder again last night." I pause. "But….it was different this time."

"Different? Different how?" She asks with a confusing look on her face.

"Different…..in that it wasn't a dream." I answer before taking another sip of coffee.

"Wasn't a…" She then pauses and her confused look changes. "Oh my god you astraled with him didn't you?"

"You…you know about that?"

"A little but yes, I do. It's when you connect with someone spiritually when you leave your physical body. Your..souls come together so to speak on another plane of existence." She looks at me. "Dana, did this really happen for you?"

I nod my head slowly.

She reaches forward and hugs me. "Oh, Dana! I'm so happy for you! I know how badly you wanted to see him. How..how did you come up with the idea?"

"Missy." I whisper.

"Your sister?"

"Yes. She…appeared to me one night and told me how to do it. But…every time I tried to get through to Mulder he would close himself off to me and prevent me from connecting with him."

"And last night you succeeded?"

"Yes."

"Then why do you appear that you're not happy? I mean…you reconnected with Mulder in one of the most powerful ways possible, with his soul. That shows just what kind of connection the two of you have. This should prove to you that anything is possible."

"But..it's not enough." I whisper.

"Dana, if anything it should give you hope."

"It's not enough!" I scream back pulling away from her and spilling my coffee all over the floor. I then hear the cry of William in the background.

"We both know why he is crying, Dana. You need to try and control your emotions."

I put my head in my hands. "I…I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"Why, Dana? Talk to me."

I raise my head and fold my hands under my chin. "It's just that…I don't want to just be with him in the astral. I…I want to be with him in the physical too. I want him here. I..I want to feel him lying next to me. I want to be able to wrap my arms around him and place kisses on his cheek."

"You can do that on the astral plane too…"

"But it's not the same, Monica!" I reply throwing my hands out in frustration. "It's true that I can but then I wake up and I'm all alone again! That part doesn't change!" I pause trying to gather my thoughts. "William needs his father, Monica. And not just spiritually. He needs him physically. He..he needs to feel his presence."

"You think he doesn't already?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you really think that Mulder doesn't have that same connection with his son that he has with you?"

"But…William is just a baby. He doesn't…"

"It doesn't matter if he is a baby or not, Dana. Regardless of that fact, he does have a soul. And his father can astral with him as well. And as long as he can, he will always be with William. He may not be there physically but he will be there…"

"In his heart." I finish.

Monica nods. "See, you do understand more than you know. William doesn't understand the concept of the physical and astral plane like we do Dana. He doesn't know there is a difference between the two. To him they are the same just the astral is easier to get around in. What I'm trying to say is it doesn't matter to him if he sees his father on the astral or the physical. Just having his presence around him is all he needs."

"I….I guess I hadn't thought of it that way before."

Monica takes my hand again. "I know how difficult this is for you, Dana. Dealing with your hectic life on top of Mulder being away from you. But there is one thing I know. And one thing that I know Mulder would agree with me on and that is that you are a strong person. You can get through this. After everything you and Mulder have been through in nine years, this is just another obstacle to overcome. If you give in to all this negativity and doubt around you then Mulder's leaving will all be in vain. And…you will begin to resent him for leaving you, which will cause you to block him away from you spiritually. Is that what you want to happen?"

"Of course not."

"Then believe in him, Dana. Believe in what he is doing for you and William. Know that it is difficult for him to be away as well. I have never seen such love and devotion between two people as I have you and Mulder. What you have…goes beyond the physical realm and into another that everyone on this planet including me would be envious of. Don't throw that away, Dana."

As I sit there listening to her words, I realize just how right she is. It's almost like Missy is sitting there and speaking right through her. Maybe she is and I just don't know it? I listen and hear that William has stopped crying now. I feel myself calm, more at peace than I was just a few minutes ago. It's amazing what can happen when you actually listen. "I won't, Monica. I promise. Thank…thank you for helping me to see these things."

"Anytime." Monica smiles back and then glances at her watch. "Oh, I'd better head back to the office before John sends the hounds out after me. I told him I just went to Starbucks to grab us breakfast. Are you going to be ok?"

I smile back at her. "Yeah, I'll be fine. Just give me some time to get dressed and drop William off at my mother's and I'll be in to talk to you about that case."

"I look forward to it." She replies before rising off the couch. "I'm sorry about your carpet."

"The coffee? Oh, don't worry about it. It's that outburst that led to this conversation in the first place." I reply with a smile. "I'll leave it as a memento. Every time I get upset or depressed I'll look at it and remember what you told me."

"You can always get some stain cleaner." She answers heading toward the door.

"It's always too easy to cover up something with something else." I reply back as I open the door for her. "Monica?"

She turns around. "Yes, Dana?"

"Thank….thank you for everything and coming over here this morning. It…it means a lot."

"What are friends for?" She asks before smiling and walking out the door.

As I close the door, I make a decision. Tonight, I will go to Mulder but this time I won't go alone. This time we will be together as a family. The way it should be.


	3. We Are A Family And Always Will Be

Today was the longest day of my life. I had a very difficult time concentrating on anything due to what happened last night and this morning. Now that I've reconnected with Mulder, he is on my mind even more than before. I see his face every time I look at a man; hear his voice as someone speaks to me. Sometimes I think I even hear him whispering in my ear when the wind blows. I really don't know how much more of this I can take. And all day long I've been contemplating in my mind what is going to happen tonight when I see him again and when I bring William with me. Does Mulder know that William can be with us in the astral plane? And more importantly will William be willingly to do this with us?

I unlock my apartment door and step inside. "Mom? I'm home."

My mother comes walking from the back room. "Dana, hi you have perfect timing. I just got him to sleep."

"I'm so sorry I got back so late, Mom." I take off my coat and hang it in the closet. "I really didn't intend on that happening."

"It's ok, Dana. I know that things come up at work sometimes. And besides William is an angel to take care of, I don't mind." She watches as I toss my satchel onto a chair before collapsing on the couch. "Dana, is everything all right?"

"I'm just tired, Mom." I answer rubbing my temples.

"Long day?"

"It's not just that, Mom. It's grading papers, teaching, assisting in cases…" I let out a sigh. "I really wish I was a robot at times like this."

"Dana, if you need me to take William for a while to give you some relief I can."

I lift my head. "No! I mean, no that's ok, Mom. He actually helps me get through some of this believe it or not."

"Actually, yes I can. I know that when your father was away, having my kids around helped me to…" She then notices me lower my head and put my face in my hands. "Dana, what is it? It's Fox, isn't it? I'm sorry I didn't mean to say that to bring him up."

"I…I just miss him so much."

My mother takes a seat next to me on the couch and pulls me to her. "I know you do, sweetie. And I don't truly understand just why he left you and William the way he did but…"

"He did it to save us, Mom."

She lets out a sigh. "I know you told me that before Dana but at what price? Right now William needs to see his father. It's very crucial at this point in his life."

I lift my head from her shoulder. "Do you really think I don't know that, Mom? All I have been dealing with for months is that Mulder left because he abandoned William and me. Because…he wasn't ready to be father and so he used an excuse to bail on us."

"Dana, I never said that."

"You don't have to, Mom. I can see it in your eyes." I pull away from her. "And just so you know Mom, I know Mulder did not abandon us. And I know that this is killing him as much as it is me if not more."

"But HOW do you know, Dana? You haven't spoken to him in months!"

"I just know ok? You may not understand this but we have a connection that goes beyond physical, Mom. We know what the other person feels." I shake my head. "I don't expect you or anyone else to understand but we do. And the important thing is that I know what he feels about this situation and that is all that counts. I love him and he loves William and me more than anything. And he will come back for us when it's safe."

She lets out a sigh. "Then I guess there is nothing more left to say, Dana." She rises from the couch. "I should get back. As I said William is sleeping comfortably in his crib and has already been fed."

"Thank you, Mom."

"Anytime. Get some rest ok?" She reaches forward and hugs me tightly.

"I will." I answer hugging her back.

She kisses me on the forehead. "Take, care Dana." She then gets her coat and purse out of the closet. "And remember that offer I gave you about William still stands." She then opens the door and steps out.

I let out a sigh as I slowly rise from the couch. I know what Mom is feeling about this. She does think that Mulder abandoned us. This is just the first time she has verbally suggested it. I suppose it doesn't help when I come home looking like this. I know she is just concerned for the well being of William and me. I make my way to the nursery where sure enough William is sleeping peacefully in his crib. I'm so lucky to have Mom near by to help me take care of him. And I can tell how much William just adores her as well. I reach down and carefully kiss him on the cheek so as to disturb him. "Sleep well, William." I whisper before pulling away from him and quietly leaving the nursery.

Walking to my bedroom, I take off my clothes and slip into my pajamas. There are days when it feels good to get out of your clothes and this is definitely one of them. I almost feel like burning the outfit I was wearing today. I surprised it wasn't fused to my skin. I pull back the spread from the bed and slip under the covers. Normally I read a little before going to sleep but tonight I won't need that. Tonight, sleep will overcome me naturally. As soon as my head hits the pillow, my eyes instantly close.

* * *

It seems like I've just barely gotten to sleep when I hear a voice in my ear. 

"Wake up, baby."

My eyes open and I turn to see Mulder standing on the side of the bed. "Mulder?"

"The one and only." He replies with a smile as he stretches out his hand to me.

I slowly sit up and take his hand. "How…how did you get here so quickly? I mean I just fell asleep…"

"You've been asleep for hours, Scully."

"I…I have?"

He nods. "I just didn't want to wake you quite yet." He pulls me from the bed. "Are you ready?"

I turn back around and see myself still lying on the bed with my eyes closed. "Oh my god." I whisper. "So we are…"

"Astraling." He finishes. "Yes, Scully we are. Are you ready to go to our special place?"

"Not quite yet."

He looks at me with a confused look. "What…what do you mean?"

I take his hand and lead him down the hallway and to the nursery. "We are a family, Mulder. That means no one is excluded." Remembering what Missy taught me about calling Mulder, I use the same technique for William as I approach the crib. Reaching down my hands, I slowly pick up William leaving his physical body still in a state of rest. The surprised look on Mulder's face is incredible and I feel the exact same way as I walk up to him. "Now we can go as a family."

Mulder smiles and then reaches down kissing William on the forehead. "Hey there, buddy. Did ya miss me?"

William lets out a cooing and reaches up his tiny hand toward his father.

"I think that's a yes." I answer with a grin. I then hold out William to him. "Why don't you take him, daddy?"

I see Mulder's entire face light up as he takes William into his arms. He looks just like that night he first held him. As proud as any father could be. He looks down at William. "Awww, I've missed you too pal. Listen, I need you to hold on tight to daddy ok? Cause we're going to take a little ride. And where we are going is real nice. There are birds and butterflies; waterfalls and nothing can hurt you. Sound good to you?" He laughs as William lets out a high-pitched squeal. "I thought you would like that. Only stipulation is when your Mommy and I want some private time, you give it. Deal?" He reaches out his hand to William and gets a response involving a tiny hand. "All right." He turns to me. "Ready, Scully?"

I walk up to Mulder and William. "I'm ready, Mulder."

"Ok, then close your eyes and imagine the field just like we did last night."

* * *

Opening my eyes I once again find myself in the field Mulder and I were in last night. It looks just as beautiful now as it did then. I look down and see I'm wearing the same white dress I had on last night as well. I guess this is going to be my attire whenever I visit this field? Not that I mind it of course. I look over and see Mulder throwing William up into the air. Panic instantly grips me as I run toward them. "Mulder!" 

Mulder turns to me as he catches William. "What is it, Scully?"

"You….you shouldn't toss him like that."

"Why not?" He looks down at William. "You want to go flying again, little buddy?" He receives another high-pitched squeal followed by a shaking of two tiny hands excitedly. "Here we go!"

"No!" I yell but it's too late and William is already airborne. At first I am absolutely terrified at what I am witnessing and I cover my eyes waiting to hear a thump. But instead all I hear are cries of laughter. I uncover my eyes and see as William flies up into the air, with the field echoing his happiness. He is not scared at all. And his giggles encourage Mulder to toss even higher.

"It's ok, Scully. See he likes it." He then holds William in his arms. "Ok, little buddy let's take a little break before we give mommy a heart attack."

"I'm sorry I over reacted like that. I was just afraid that something would happen to him."

"It's ok, Scully. Here he has nothing to fear. It seems this place is actually good for him." He takes William and places him on his back. "Why don't we go by the water?"

"I think that's a good idea."

He looks up at William. "Hang on partner." Bracing William with the back of his hand, he starts walking down the path with William on his shoulders.

I can't help but smile as I watch Mulder move up and down as he walks emitting giggles from William. This is what I've always wanted to see: father and son playing together. This is like a dream come true for me. I know now that Mulder and William have never lost that bond between them. And Mulder is the happiest I have ever seen him. I just wish mom and everyone else could be here to witness this to know that their theories about Mulder abandoning us are not true. I follow them down the path and over to the same bank Mulder and I were at last night.

"Ok, coming in for a landing!" Mulder calls to William as he slowly starts to squat down. He then leans forward, gently sending William rolling to the ground.

At first, I look on apprehensively until I hear the high-pitched squeal from William again. "You really do have a way with him, Mulder."

"What can I say?" He asks grinning as he lies back and puts his hands behind his head. He then pats the ground beside him. "Daddy wants mommy to sit with him."

I carefully take a seat next to Mulder. Glancing over I see William stretching out his arms toward a butterfly. "He seems so happy here."

"He is and so am I." He reaches out his hand, caressing the side of my face. "But I know something that would make me even happier."

"What's that?"

"A kiss from mommy."

"What about William?"

"He's being detained by that butterfly. He won't even know."

"Then how could I possibly say no?"

"You can't." He answers leaning into me slowly and placing a kiss on my lips. He rubs my cheeks slowly as he deepens the kiss slightly.

I can feel that energy passing once again between us as our lips are joined in a kiss. It is truly the most wonderful feeling in the world. This one kiss alone is worth more than any physical pleasure. All of the worries from today are being purged from me in this kiss. And he is once again rekindling that part deep inside of me that refuses to lose hope. I wrap my arms around his neck as I deepen the kiss even more, pushing myself to him.

Snaking his arm around my back, he continues to kiss me as he pulls me to the ground with him. He then starts to run his hands slowly down my side and under my dress. "Mmmm….Scully."

At first I answer him with moans from his touches. But then I realize we are not alone and I pull away. "Mulder, we…we can't."

"Of course we can." He whispers before starting to kiss my neck.

I push him away again. "Not with William, here."

He lets out a sigh as he rests his head on my neck. "Oh, yeah. I uh kind of forgot about that little detail."

"It just wouldn't be right, you know?"

He nods. "I know. But next time you come…" He places his mouth to my ear. "You come alone."

I take a swallow as I feel his hot breath on my neck. "I…I will. I promise."

"Good." He answers pulling back again. He looks back over at William who is still playing with the butterfly. "You cost me some lovin' partner. Guess I'll have to do something about that huh?" He then starts to tickle William. William starts to giggle and kick wildly as his father tickles him. Mulder then pauses and looks at me with his eyebrows raised.

"You wouldn't dare."

"And tickle mommy too!" He yells before reaching forward and tickling my sides.

* * *

The rest of our visit we spend just like a family would at a park minus the picnic. We lay on the bank next to each other with William in the middle. We hardly say a word just indulging in this closeness. And then eventually, comes the inevitable: the time to leave. 

"Mulder, it's late." I reply looking over at William yawning. "He loses much more energy here than I do."

Mulder lets out a sigh. "I know. Guess we tuckered the little guy out too much." He reaches over and gently picks up William in his arms before rising from the ground.

I slowly rise up next to him. "Mulder, you know this won't be forever."

"I know, Scully. It's just you don't want a good feeling to ever leave you."

"It won't Mulder, remember?" I place my hand on his heart. "William and I will always be in there with you."

He glances down at William who is contently sucking his thumb. "I was just afraid he had forgotten me."

"That will never happen, Mulder. And now that I know William can travel with us, I will never lose hope again."

"Nor will I."

"And I know that you will find a way to come back to us eventually."

"I promise." He reaches forward kissing me on the lips. He then feels William wiggle in his arms. "Uh-oh someone wants to go back, I think." He hands William to me. "Take good care of him, Scully."

"Always." I whisper trying to hold back my tears. "Does…does this get any easier?"

Mulder shakes his head. "I don't think so. But remember you promised me that next time we would be alone. I'm going to hold you to that now."

I let out a chuckle as I sniffle. "I promise." I reach forward and kiss his forehead. "I love you."

He touches my cheek. "I love you, Scully."

I step away from him with William in my arms and close my eyes taking us back to the physical realm once again.

* * *

Every night Mulder and I see each other. Sometimes as a family and other times just with each other. The rumors and gossip about us just bounces off of me because of these astral visits. And with each one, I become more confident and strong that he will come back to his family. And until he does, the night belongs to us. It's been said that the night belongs to lovers and now after all this time, I truly understand what that phrase means. I only hope that some day I am able to share with William just what happened on those nights in the field with his father. But perhaps he already knows? Regardless of that, at least we are a family and always will be.

THE END


End file.
